Hard choices made more difficult

I've been underemployed for close to a year and a half. I need to get a better job. I've been on the job search for the past year, but it has been unsuccessful. The key to getting there is to make the search it a part-time job. To pound at the search relentlessly until something cracks.

I've got a part-time job. It pays some of the bills. I've got another part-time job. I write. Over the past week, I've stopped writing in order to concentrate more on the job search. What is making this difficult is that I'm being rewarded on my previous writing. And because I find the job search stressful.

Two people in the writing group have send me notes about how much they're enjoying the Current Project. That's unprecedented. The story, if I do say so myself, is very good. It will be published after it is finished and polished. And, on Saturday, I received my first pro-pay check for a story ("The Dark Horse" in Cthulhu 2012). That's something I've wanted for a very long time.

But right now, the short-term goals are more important than the long-term ones. And hopefully, when I have a new job, I'll be able to return to writing with a renewed sense of urgency. But I'm not very happy right now.